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September 2, 2012

Growing up I had my life all planned out. Well, up until  my early 30s at least. I really couldn’t imagine life past that point. I really never thought that day would come (30+). Ha. I saw college graduation and grad school in my future. I saw myself then working a good job and buying a nice car and house and just enjoying life.

And then a few things happened to totally change the way I view things. I actually started traveling outside our country for one. And I read this book.

Now…I have no plan anymore. =) And life is so incredibly exciting this way!

I realized that “The American Dream” is not the only way to live life. There are so many other ways to “do life” and I realized that I don’t want to plan out my future with my own tiny dreams. I want God to put me wherever He wants me to be. Even if that means letting go of everything that is comfortable and safe. For me, that’s a big step, because I like being comfortable.  I like being able to see a ways down the road. I like having plans. I am by nature a planner. I don’t like the ambiguous or unknown.

And yet, in the unknown is where God shows Himself the strongest. When we have to live by faith is when He gets the most glory. If I have it all figured out and planned out, I leave no room for God to work and provide and show me just how amazing He is.

The unknown is the place where I have often grown the most. It’s the place where I know I want to be, and yet at the same time I find myself pulling back at times because I know it’s not always easy there. Not knowing what the next step is is uncomfortable for me.

But when all is said and done, I know I don’t want to spend my life just being comfortable. (As much as my flesh wants that.) I really do desire more out of life. I want to live my life to the fullest. I want to live my life in a way that God gets the glory for everything and that I can’t take credit for any of it. And that takes a daily renewing, because so often I just fall back into my routine.

A friend asked me recently when I was going to write more about Russia. So here it is.  =)

I had been praying for a while that God would show me what He wanted me to do next. Life had gotten very comfortable and while I liked it that way, I also was really ready for an adventure. God had given me a great job almost 5 years ago when I got back from grad school and through that I was able to buy a car, save up some money, and also do a lot of traveling. Life was/is really, really fun! 

But over the years all of the traveling to various parts of the world, as well as reading the book I linked to earlier, had really changed my views on a lot of things and really changed me. I didn’t want to just live my life to accumulate nice things, and basically just work to live. I wanted to do more. But what? I wasn’t sure. I looked into a lot of different opportunities but nothing seemed right for me. I just continued to pray that God would show me where He wanted me to go next. After all, this is a pretty big world, and I was open to going anywhere. So how do you narrow it down from there? My coworker who had spent time teaching English in Asia was going to a teachers event someplace down near the beach and she invited me to go along. She was looking for new opportunities to go live and work abroad and she knew I’d be interested. I planned to go. I even registered for it online. And then something came up and I couldn’t go. I was bummed. She came back and told me that she’d agreed to go work in South Korea and was leaving in a few months and that I should come visit her sometime. =) (yay for friends who live around the world!)

I got even more restless. The urge for a new adventure was almost overwhelming. But I knew that if God had put me here, and given me my job (seriously, it was all Him so I knew He wanted me here for the time being) then I needed to be content where I was. And so I was. There is peace in knowing you are where God wants you, and so I just rested in that and decided to enjoy it. If God wanted me here, who was I to think I should be someplace else?

And then out of the blue one day a friend posted a simple question on facebook. “Anyone interested in an overseas job?” Not thinking much about it I sent her a short message asking “ooh, what is it?” And I got a reply right back with the details. She then asked if she could send my info to her boss. I couldn’t believe it. I mean, God has always provided a job for me. I’ve never one time had to go looking for a job. (I am worried that one day I really won’t know what to do if I have to go job hunting, ha!) But this “job” was everything I had been wanting! A chance to live overseas. (Europe at that.) A chance to help missionaries. A chance to get into teaching English. A chance to do some traveling. A chance to step out of my comfort zone in a major way. A chance to live by faith (quitting a good job with benefits and retirement, etc, is scary for me – although I know God will provide, He always does!)

After all the searching I had done online, trying to find something that sounded perfect for me, God just dropped this into my lap. I was speechless. And overwhelmed. And insanely excited. And a little bit nervous.

But seriously, I am really excited about the opportunity and so thankful that God provided it. If you’d have asked me 5 years ago when I had just finished grad school where I’d be in 5 years, I never would have been able to see something like this. (I don’t think I would have even been interested in something like this 5 years ago.) I’m so thankful that God grows us and changes us to prepare us for what He wants us to do.

People keep telling me that it’s going to be very different than America. And that there will be lots of things I am going to miss (hello, guacamole!) and I totally know that. I am sure there will be days where I wonder what in the world I have gotten myself into. I just keep telling people that if I wanted everything to be like America, I would just stay in America then. I know things will be different. And they will probably be frustrating from time to time as well. But…I hope and pray that God uses this in my life to make me more like Him and to change me into what He wants me to be. I am so excited to see what He does!

I will write more about it when it gets closer. For now I am just trying to learn a bit of Russian and also trying to find warm winter clothes (no easy task here in So Cal). If you know of a great website where I can get nice, dressy, warm clothes, please do share!

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Becky permalink
    September 3, 2012 5:52 am

    So excited for you!!

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