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One of those days…

June 12, 2008
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Today is one of those days where I have a million things racing through my mind and there is no way I can pick just one thing to write about, sorry, hope it doesn’t make your brain hurt too much!

I am counting down the days till summer camp. I love summer camp! Even though summer camp now means work when I go, it is still fun! I kinda hope I can be a team captain again, that was a lot of fun last time! But I am not sure they will need me to be one. They usually have the married couples be captains, there just happened to be a single youth leader there last year so they put us together… Oh well, we’ll see.

The other day some of the teen girls were asking me why I work so much (and can’t do things like go to Knott’s Berry Farm with them) and I reminded them that I was saving to get a new car so that I can fit more of them when we go do things (every time I have to squish them in my truck I remind them I am saving for a new car). They thought about that for half a second and then said “you should get a van.” It made me laugh. Can you imagine me driving a minivan? Talk about making me look old. (no offense if you drive a van) Then I would need the car seats and diaper bags…no thanks. Not for  LONG time, if ever! But it reminded me of when I was a kid. Back then the only type of automobile that existed in my world was a minivan! I remember looking at other minivans that people drove and wondering what kind I would want when I was older. I am so not kidding. What a nerd I was! I guess I thought about lots of weird things when I was a kid. I don’t remember most of it, but I do remember one day when the thought occured to me “I could never commit some crime and get away with it.” Seriously, that’s what I thought. Not that I would ever want to commit a crime. But the thought that even if I ever wanted to, I couldn’t, made me sad. And the reason why I thought I couldn’t was because I knew a redhead running down the street would stand out like cranberry in a bowl of blueberries. “Yes, officer, she has long, bright red hair, shouldn’t be hard to miss.” The thought never occured to me that I could dye my hair. Well, it did cross my mind, but that was never a viable option, I couldn’t imagine dying my hair, not then, not now. And the day I realized that I couldn’t commit a crime, my world became just a little bit smaller. I was truly sad. It makes me laugh now. Why would I ever want to rob a bank? Besides all the extra cash, but really…

Speaking of things people will do for money. It never ceases to amaze me the number of truly ditzy women who will date/marry men old enough to be their grandfather just because they have extra cash. But I guess those types deserve each other. They must both know that they are being used and it is still worth it to them? I guess. I mean, honestly, when a 20 year old girl is dating a 75 year old celebrity and she has the audacity to tell the press, “I really love him.” Possibly that could be interpreted as “I really love the fact that this old geezer will buy me whatever I want and has set up a nice bank account for me”? And I love the fact that we are vacationing in Montenegro this summer (Montenegro has just been added to my “must visit someday” list) and he has just filled my jewelery box with original designs from VanCleef and Arpels and he has hired a chef for our summer chalet in the Swiss Alps! I just love him sooo much, sigh.” Please. 

So James leaves next Wednesday. I am so sad. I almost started crying when we were watching the DVD at the luncheon last week! I was all cool watching it, it was fascinating, till I turned and saw my mom’s eyes watering. Then I was like “oh yeah, this isn’t just some awesome DVD, this is what James is going to be doing in a few weeks. Then it was all sad. It looks crazy the stuff they have to do, on top of going to class and doing homework and all the normal college stuff. Anyways, so somehow this week my mom and I are planning a going away party – we still have tons to do. My mom had wanted to have a really small party with just a few people (I kept trying to get her to invite more people since I’m all about big parties:) ) – but when she asked James who he wanted to invite, his guest list was so long she thought about just inviting the whole church! (I talked her out of that – that would be even more insane!)

Ummm….that’s all for now.

I’m baaack!

Have you ever had a conversation with someone that just made you go, “huh?” I have at least one of those every day at the library! Like the guy I had yesterday. “I don’t have my ID, can I still check out?” “You have to have either your library card or your ID to check out.” “I have my ID.” “Well, then you can check out.” And then you go, “huh? Why did he even ask that?” I never know. I had one guy once that made me laugh. He came up to the desk and said “Hi, how are you?” So I said, “good, how are you?” He said, “Good, how are you?” I laughed and said, “this could go on all day.” I think I embarrassed him, he turned red, but at least he laughed back. Then I had a lady the other day who told me she liked my hair. After a minute she added, “what color is it?” Huh?  The thoughts that raced through my head….Is she color blind? Why did she say my hair was beautiful when she doesn’t even know what color it is? Is she messing with me?  Then I took a shot at what I suddenly thought she must have meant. “OH, no, it’s natural.” That must have been it because her response was appropriate and she didn’t look weirded out. I guess she was expecting me to say “oh it’s Autumn Sunset, Loreal number 85. Aisle 10 at Wal Mart.” I seriously think I should start a hair color line, I bet I could get rich! That and a diet program. Whenever people ask my how I stay so thin, I am so tempted to mess with them. Oh, you eat nothing but carrots, that’s what I do. And the nice side effect is that it turns your hair red at the same time. And then I offer to sell them some carrot plants that I have. One of these days, if you see me driving a Porsche you will know why! (okay, I don’t even like Porsches so never mind)

Today at lunch I was given something that I have never been given before. A hard hat. A hard hat at a “staff appreciation” luncheon. Bright yellow. And I had to put it on and get my picture taken. They proclaimed the picture “beautiful” and then let me get my food. I have yet to see the picture, but I think it’s safe to say the picture is far from beautiful. At least I got a free hard hat out of it. Okay, it’s not a real hard hat. If an old bound Time magazine book were to fall off the top shelf and hit me, this “hard” hat would be squashed. It looks great, but it’s sorta made out of a squishy soft plastic. They want us to wear the hats to promote the new children’s room expansion which kicks off on Monday, same day as the kickoff for summer reading club. Some evil person has it out for us. Have you ever seen a library on the first day of summer reading club registration? You would think we were giving out free books or something. (We are giving out free books) Well anyways, I am not sure if I will wear the hat at work or not (I think it’s safe to say I won’t, but you never know) but I can think of someone who will wear the hat. In fact, I am predicting that as soon as I take it home I will never see it again. It will look perfect with his orange crossing guard vest.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. Antonia permalink
    June 12, 2008 12:00 pm

    I enjoyed your commiting a crime segment! I needed to laugh this morning!

  2. jenmarie permalink*
    June 12, 2008 12:09 pm

    I can’t believe I seriously ever thought that, and that it made me sad. I guess I had too much time on my hands!
    I’m glad it made you laugh. 🙂 I still want to come up again. I will talk to Brandi and see if we can work something out!

  3. Becka permalink
    June 23, 2008 9:14 am

    You are hilarious! You should write a book! 🙂 You could be the next…umm.. can’t think of a humorous author at the moment, my brain is a little tired. lol
    I bet your brother looks great in that hard hat! lol

  4. jenmarie permalink*
    June 23, 2008 2:08 pm

    lol, I would love to write someday! My writing has gotten pretty bad lately since I really don’t write anymore…I want to go to some remote cabin and just make myself write, that would be fun! 🙂

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